I have it from reliable sources that the irksome, juvenile conversation (non)starter 'wassup' is fast losing popularity to another equally grating phrase 'gimme news'. My mind freezes when I hear that one, and despite the faint knowledge that it's not so much a query as a greeting, I start racking my brains for some 'newsworthy' going-ons in my life.
Today's been one of those uneventful days, and I'm a bit skittish about coming across someone on the way home who accosts me with a 'gimme news'.
Perhaps, a quick run through of the Gulf News might bail me out. A few samples:
Parents should never be abused or disrespected
Not bad for starters. Here's how a conversation could go...
Person X: Yo, Lee, gimme news
Me: Umm... hiya, you know you gotta respect your parents.
Person X: Whoa, stay away from me. Smokin' up's illegal in this country, y'know.
Me: Speaking of which, have you heard of the professor who admitted to carrying drugs. He said, "I am a university professor in the United States. I am guilty and want to be given the punishment I deserve"
Person X (backing away a bit): What-evah! Listen, I gotta go...
Me: Sure, but remember, don't watch TV while driving, ok
Person X: Whatever's wrong with you, I hope it's not contagious.
Me: Rats! I missed the health pages today, can I get back to you on that tomorrow?